Third Time's a Charm
by Malevolent-Chan
Summary: Naruto is depressed that Sasuke is not back on Christmas. Sai notices Naruto's depression and tries his best to fix Naruto's ba humbug spirit. Rated M.


Hello everyone! This is a super short little Christmas story. Don't take it to seriously, it's just for laughs. Hope you enjoy your present!

**Disclaimer : This is probably what would happen if Naruto's owners had to much eggnog, I on the other hand am just messed up in the head.**

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Sai watched into Naruto's apartment from the shadows. The boy was decorating some sort of tree with round balls and lights. Sai furrowed his brow and watched as Naruto flopped to the ground, obviously depressed. Naruto stared up to his tree in discontent. Sai listened as he muttered something like, "what good is Christmas without the people you care about the most!" A look of confusion spread across Sai's face. He left, wandering about the village and noting the various trees of decor and lights strung about. He soon met Sakura in whom he asked, "what is Christmas?" Sakura tilted her head and said, "It's a lot of things, a holiday when you spend time with your family, santa brings presents to little kids, you know, a time of giving and receiving of sorts. I gotta run, Tsunade san is looking for me, I'm sure you'll figure it out!" Sai smiled and waved, thinking in his head, "what an ugly girl." He continued walking until he came upon the library and sat in thought.

"Without people you care about the most," he could easily mean several people I suppose. Jiraiya, Sasuke. Probably Sasuke in particular. Either way I don't like to see him depressed. A time of "giving and receiving, huh?" I read something about that recently.

He dug into his bag and pulled out one of his psychology books labeled "a guide to homosexuality"

Naruto sat on his bed looking at his old picture of squad 7. He hadn't done much since putting up his tree earlier. Christmas was tomorrow and more than anything he just wanted him back. Naruto was suddenly jarred from his thoughts by a knock on his door. Naruto sighed and went to his to open it. In surprise of who he saw, he fell to the floor. Sasuke was looking in at him on the floor.

"Wh-what?" Naruto asked.

"Merry Christmas, Naruto."

"Who the hell are you?" Naruto asking, pointing at the Sasuke-intruder.

"I'm Sasuke of course!"

"This joke isn't funny!" Naruto said, irritated.

Sasuke-intruder sighed.

"It's not supposed to be a joke...more like a 'present.' It's a time of giving and receiving," _Sasuke_ said matter of factly.

Naruto facepalmed.

"What are you doing, Sai?"

Sasuke-Sai tilted his head.

"How'd you know?"

"Who else wouldn't understand the meaning of Christmas? Besides only you wouldn't be able to imitate him very well. He would never say, "merry Christmas." Nice try I guess" He said laying completely flat. Sai sat beside him.

"Well to be honest I knew you would see through it. I thought it could be more of a vicarious thing. I overheard you saying that Christmas is no good without the people you care about the most so..."

Sai was startled to hear Naruto burst-out-laughing beside him.

"What is so funny, Naruto?"

"Oh, it's nothing...it's just I was venting you know, Sasuke and I, well we both didn't have any family to spend with over the holiday and everyone else was too busy to find time for us so we used to just chill. He always acted like it was no big deal or anything, but I know he missed them—his family, and I wasn't sure who to miss. I thought I got him back then. I guess I didn't, although I know how he felt now."

"Hm, I see, but... what is funny about that?"

Naruto giggled again.

"Will you change back already?"

Sai released the jutsu and turned back to Naruto.

"It's just, it's funny you'd go to that extreme. I didn't really think about it but you don't have anyone to spend this time with do you?" Naruto asked with a warm smile.

Sai glanced away and replied "no."

"Cool, then it's just you and me then."

"So uh, what exactly were you planning to do in Sasuke's form?" Naruto asked curiously.

"I was going to engage you in sexual intercourse" Sai said flatly.

Naruto jolted.

"What the hell?!"

"Hmm, was that wrong? Sakura said it was a time to spend with your friends and give and receive so I assumed-"

"No, no, no, stupid! You give gifts like wrapped up stuff in boxes and bags that the other person would like!" Naruto yelled, punching Sai in the arm.

"Oh, but there was something about that right?" Sai asked, pointing up.

Naruto followed his finger and gulped.

"Well, uh...th-that's just for decoration!?"

"No I'm pretty sure I read about that. If two people are under mistletoe they are supposed to kiss."

Naruto's eyes grew wide. Sai grabbed his collar and said, "apparently there is no way out of it."

They clashed lips and Naruto's arms swung around in all directions as he attempted to escape Sai's wrath.

Finding Naruto's warmth pleasing, he pulled Naruto closer and thought deviously, 'yep, just me and you."

Naruto thought to himself sadly, 'this is the_ third_ time I've kissed a guy."

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Has anyone ever found it humorous that kisses are always shared between Naruto and Sasuke even when so many girls like him lol. Talk about fan service :) Well if you liked this I have another story kinda like it called, It Wasn't the First Time, if you're intrested. Please review, thanx!

Happy Holidays

- Malevolent-Chan


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